Friendships aren’t built overnight. It takes time, shared experiences, and moments of intentional conversation to form those bonds. When youth groups are only able to spend a few hours together each week, it can feel like it’s taking forever for your group to become close. However, we find that spending an extended period of time together during a conference or retreat can supercharge the bonds of friendship among your group, allowing members to discover what it’s like to truly belong to a community of faith.
Below, we’ve collected a few of our favorite tips and tricks for engaging young people during a retreat or conference at Montreat. Keep them in mind as you start planning your next event!
Make Time for Meaningful Conversation
One advantage of a longer gathering is the opportunity for youth to move beyond everyday small talk as they engage with their peers. When planning a retreat, it is important to set aside time for conversation, both naturally occurring and prompted, so that youth have a chance to learn about each other – what they like, what’s important to them, and what’s shaped their lives so far. Additionally, you will want to create space for youth to reflect on their faith and become more comfortable asking questions and sharing their perspectives. Each of these elements will help to create an environment where youth trust their peers and strive to understand and accept each other.
If you would like some help in this area, we highly recommend checking out our archive of small group leader manuals. These free resources include discussion prompts and other activities developed for use during Montreat Youth Conference. You can access them by clicking here.
Balance Reflection with Recreation
Of course, not every moment needs to be serious! Games, outdoor activities, and creative projects can be just as important when it comes to building relationships. Structured recreation encourages youth to interact with others they might not know as well, practice working as a team, or even discover shared interests. It can also give some of your more energetic youth an outlet for that energy, allowing them to focus and engage respectfully during more serious moments. Just make sure that you select activities that allow everyone to get involved, regardless of ability or skill level.
Give Youth a Chance to Lead
Surely your group contains a few aspiring leaders, so give them a chance to get involved! Invite youth to help plan activities, lead prayers, or facilitate discussions. Not only does this help you, it also gives them a sense of ownership over the experience and helps them recognize that their involvement matters. When young people are trusted with responsibility, they have opportunities to develop confidence, practice leadership, and discover new ways to participate in the life of the church. These experiences can encourage them to stay involved and invite others into the community. It’s a win-win!
Start Building Community
Strong relationships take time to develop, but spending time together in Montreat can help create the conditions that allow those connections to grow. Young people who feel connected are more likely to show up, invite their friends, take on new responsibilities, and find meaningful ways to participate in the life of your congregation, so give them an opportunity to forge those bonds! Explore our youth and young adult offerings or visit our Retreat in Montreat webpage to start planning a trip today.
This article was originally published in the October 2026 edition of Montreat Conference Center’s email newsletter Embodying Hospitality which highlights information related to retreats and guest groups at Montreat. Sign up to receive Embodying Hospitality directly in your inbox by clicking here.